Am I Taking Advantage of Grace?

Am I too comfortable with God? 
Am I taking advantage of His Presence in my life?  

There was a time where all I did was seek God.  Literally all I did.  At the time I knew nothing about grace.  I was not drawn to God for his unconditional love towards me.  I was drawn to Him because I was in need of Him.  I still need God, but it is different now.  Back then I felt if I did not do the right things then He would turn His back on me.  I was caught up in the acts of self righteousness.  I did good and I felt loved.  When I made a mistake I was not loved in my mind.  So I took everything out of my life that did not reflect what I thought God did not like.  I turned from my "sinful" desires and did what was "holy". But then I met Grace. 

When I met Grace, I found a God that loved me not for what I did but for who I am.  I am a child of God and nothing can separate me from His presence.  In the process of learning of His love I fell deeper in love with God.  It was not about what He was doing in my life anymore it was about what He already done.  I was hungry for God's presence.  I wanted my day to be filled with God speaking to me.

If I am honest I have lost touch of that desire.  I take advantage of the fact that God loves me unconditionally.  I know He will never leave me, so I don't have to work on my relationship with Him.  I know He knows everything about me.  I know He loves me, so I just do as I please.  The problem is not God's love for me it is my love for Him.  I say I love God yet I don't turn to Him unless I have a request.  I have lost that passion to talk to God about everything.  I listen not to Him but to myself.  My voice has drowned out His, but I am not happy.  I miss my time with God.  I miss hearing Him through life experiences.  I miss talking to Him.  Like a college kid missing the comfort of their parents presence.  I desire God.  I don't want to pour out my gifts and fill empty.  I want to be filled by the power of His spirit.  

What I am saying is I don't want to feed on the life of others like a zombie.  I want to live off the presence of God.  My prayer is to wake up.  Only in God are we awake.  In everything I experience, I want to experience with God.  I have been lost but now I am found.  I was sleep, now I am awake.  I was blind now I see. Speak Lord, I am listening.  

Let us wake to the Presence of God and live as only we can. 

Until next time...